I'm coming back to work after a week of vacation. My first real vacation this year, actually. I only took one other vacation day this year. That was back in March, the day after I do my annual shtick at Hell Week.

But I've come to realize that to make the most of vacation time, you just have to go somewhere. Anywhere. The more places, the better. At my last job, there was one vacation week where I pretty much stayed home the whole time. That time flew by, and it just felt like any other weekend. On the other hand, I've had weekends where I went off somewhere, and it ended up feeling like a full week.

So this time it started with a trip up north for a friend's birthday, as I do every year. I got to see two movies he had on DVD and I'd been wanting to see, Taxi Driver and Logan's Run. Then it was off to Canada.

We got pulled over at customs on our way to Canada that night. Hardly the first time this has happened. We already knew the interior of that building pretty well. I guess they found it suspicious that we were only going to their country late at night and weren't staying over. They wanted passports, but we didn't bring any. They always accepted my drivers license. I don't know why things were different this year. But they took away my baseball bats. I had one tiny Red Sox souvenir bat under my seat. I told them that was "a souvenir from Fenway Park". I also had an aluminum bat in my trunk that I'd forgotten all about. I had to tell them that no, I don't play baseball. And yes, I keep it for self-defense. They took both of them away, as their duty to "protect the citizens of Canada". Whatever. I just didn't want to waste any more time there. They gave me a form that I could use to retrieve things back.

But we got through. Only american dollars (and I had to loan an extra $150 to the birthday boy at that), and no exchange places open at this time of the night. But that usually wasn't a problem; Canadians just take more of your money. And we finally drove all the way to that grand ol' foreign brothel. I recognized one of the women as somebody that I'd been with the last time I was there, 2 years ago. But my pick that night was definitely influenced by having watched Logan's Run -- she looked a lot like the character Jessica Six, who I'd been lusting over as I watched the movie that morning. I'll spare the lusty details, though I did mention all those details to Gloria. Suffice to say, I'm quite happy to be in an open relationship. I decided to be daring once again and get a rum & coke, but this time with Coke instead of Pepsi. And they used Bacardi (sp?) this time. Hmm. Definitely tastes different. Still don't know if it was worth $7.

We took a different highway home that night, which meant that I had to pick up my bats another time. So that's what I did the next day. I drove all the way back, which included a trip through what was easily the worst rain I'd ever encountered while driving. But I got through. And I had to explain at customs that I just came by for my bats. Then after making the U-turn, I had to explain to US customs that I was only picking something up on the other side. "What did they take from you? A baseball bat? WHY?" "I dunno, I guess they thought it was a weapon or something." "OK, have a nice day."

I thought of stopping in New Hampshire on the way back, but I really only packed for 2 days. So I drove back home. Then on Monday night I packed and drove to New Hampshire. First destination: Funspot! As I do every year. After a night of indulging in old video games, I went to the same hotel up the street. The next day, I went back to Funspot to use up the tokens I had left. Then off to Kellerhaus. And finally over to the old town Wolfeboro. I used to hate going there when I was young and my parents had the condo, but now that I could do things on my own, I enjoy the town and the memories of the few things I did like about it. Though the rain had gotten so bad that I finally broke down and bought an umbrella. (I left mine at home that week.)

Let's see, what else was there to do around lake Winnipesaukee? I drove around to Alton Bay. And when I got there, I remembered that there isn't much of anything there! So I circled up to Weirs Beach again. I saw Pirates of the Carribean at the drive-in. Good movie, but I still can't believe they charged me $15. Fuck it, it was my vacation. I had a feeling that I'd be going to the drive-in that night, so I packed my little boom box. No sense in killing my car battery to tune into the movie's sound.

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