I was watching the "PETA" episode of Bullshit last night. They showed one of their many hard-core members who prides himself in being a convicted criminal, and he was giving a lecture. One of the things he said to his audience was "You take a baby in a crib, and put an apple and a rabbit in the crib with him. If the baby goes over to eat the rabbit...I will buy you...a brand...new...car!"

If I was at that lecture hall, I would have responded with "Put a toilet in the crib, and if that kid uses and flushes the toilet instead of shitting on the blanket, I'll give you TWO brand new cars!"