A while back Gloria gave me the invitation of going to her friends' farm for T-day. I took her up on that offer. My brother was pissed at me when he found out that I wasn't going to spend Thanksgiving with him and my parents. I guess he felt like I was betraying the family or something. He said we spent every Thanksgiving in that house, which isn't true. Some we spent at the New Hampshire condo, and at least one we spent in Florida. I thought one of us might have also spent the day at some girlfriend's parents' house in the past, but maybe I'm confusing that with Easter. But anyway, just like this past Easter, I spent it with Gloria and not my family, and had a blast.

I told Gloria a while back about my need to burn something, and she told me that these friends of hers do have a fire pit and all that they use. She asked them about it, and told me it was OK for me to use it sometime. We finally planned to use it on Thanksgiving, when I'd be over their house anyway.

Last year when I finished the hex in Craig's garage on "Parisite", we still had some stuff that didn't completely burn. Craig insisted that he didn't want to bury it near his yard. So I wrapped it in a number of things and held on to it. It was in my old bed room, then in an old cabinet, then in the trunk of my car. I kept thinking of driving up to her town and disposing it near the restaurant we used to go to, because it would be close to her and being seen on her street would be too risky, but as always there's still the risk of running into nosy people or police. And buying something can kind of leave the thought in the back of your mind that things will get dug up before they fully decompose. So I wanted to burn it once and for all.

This past Halloween, I incorporated those remains into a ritual. The theme, as I mentioned, was signalling the end of this seemingly calculated pattern of psychotic girlfriends who betrayed me. So that's also what I was there to complete. Gloria and I walked out through the snow to the woods where this fire pit was. She helped me gather some wood, get the snow out of the pit, and gave me the time I needed alone. I had a hard time lighting the fire at first, but my Boy Scout skills came through. I opened the cardboard box and took out the zipped plastic bag. I opened the plastic bag and took out the torn white pillow case. I opened the pillowcase and took out the burned candles and black cloth that was tied up with silver electrical tape. I ripped open the tape and burned the effegy remains and other devices left inside. And eventually I burned the pillow case and anything else it had contained. Even the plastic stuff melted away in the heart of the little fire. I watched it all burn into thick black smoke, and carry off in the winter air. Now, it was really all gone. No part of it to hold on to, physically or psychologically. Time for life to keep movin' on.