April 16, 2003
12:13 PM

My boss is a cunt who uses pirated software


I'm just getting over a massive cold. I think Friday was the first sick day I took this year. Another day and I think the cough will be gone. I spent some part of the weekend downloading the songs that the guitar players know and want to play. Between the ones I had in my own collection and the ones I had to download, I did get them all. I looked around the web for some of the chord progressions, and of course a couple of them needed transposing.

But last night was great. The weather was warm. It was my first time going out alone for dinner in what seemed like a while, and I indulged in some incredibly delicious seaweed soup and sushi at the Japanese place. Then I rented a few movies that I always wanted to see, but never got around to (Less Than Zero, 4 Rooms, and a movie 10 years ago I only saw part of, After Hours). I watched one as I ate the remainder of my forgotten ice cream in the freezer. It was all very relaxing.

And I got into work today to realize how much I fucking hate this job. When I think of it, though, it's not so much the field itself. I do find myself getting intrigued in some parts of software testing. And I like working at a desk where I'm absolutely guarenteed a periodically sent pay check and the same 2 days off every week. No, it's not the field. It's the people. More specifically, my manager (I think the word that best summarizes her is "cunt"), who runs things more like a school teacher. And I wasn't the first to say that. "Get in here by 10:00. It looks bad for the QA team." Meanwhile, you'd see some developers coming in at 11:00. THEY get to work at their own pace. So what's the fucking problem? My cunt of a boss. We've been through this issue so many times. And I told her, "It's like I've been telling you for years, I'm nocturnal. If it was that fucking simple, don't you think I'd do it?" "Try going to bed earlier or something." Who the fuck does she think she is, my mother? Again, as if it was that fucking simple! It's like telling a clinically-depressed person, "Well, just cheer up."

To quote a female co-worker of mine, "I fucking hate having a boss who's a woman." I'm not even going to get into the past stories like mandatory daily status reports. She's a looney, and even people from other departments know it. I thought things would brighten up a lot more now that Molly was rightfully canned. But I see that the source of idiotic bullshit is still Kole. Molly just used her as a puppet.

Why do I come in late? Well being nocturnal is part of it. I have ten times more energy at 10:00PM than I do at 10:00AM. But the other part is that I'm just not motivated. I'm sure most people will say, "Well, the problem is obviously within YOU. You can't blame the job. You need to spark up your own self-motivation." I'm sure with some people that's the problem, but other times that's a self-deceiving excuse for many who can't accept the fact that they're just not doing what they like for a living. So my problem is that I wake up and I just don't look forward to getting into the office. Then I end up staying late because I come in late. If I really, really have to come in at 10, fine. But then I'm out the fucking door at the stroke of 6! If I'm coming in early, the company can fucking blow me if they expect me to put in more than 8 hours. I don't care how much they fucking pay me; no amount of money can cover the experience of spending 50-60 hours of nearly every remaining week in your life in misery.

I want a job that lets me work at my own peak hours. And has SOMETHING remotely to do with one of my passions. But then I hear those voices that so many other unhappy people are hearing right now. Not just in my head, but from other people. "The economy is horrible. Be glad you HAVE a job!" "Yeah, I might like doing that more, but I don't want my yearly salary going from $80,000 down to $5,000."

Then again, I heard similar things when it came to changing my major. "Oh no, don't change your major to math. Stay with chemical engineering. The second year classes are the hardest ones; just get over this hump and the next two years will be fine." "I know two people with math degrees, and they both make furniture for a living." "My boyfriend was a math major, and he just found a job NOW after searching for a year." "You don't want to concentrate in actuary math? Hmm, I can't imagine there are many jobs in the other fields." Well, the "no jobs for math majors" turned out to be entire bullshit. Not all math degree holders are hired as "mathematicians", and that's exactly what I was told when I switched majors.

Though my low job moral today made me finally do something I've been debating about for some time. Well today I did it. I made a report of software piracy. Kole uses a fancy database program with an illegal license key generator. She can't use the other projects because, well, she has shitty knowledge of SQL and everything that goes with it. She's flat-out not technical...and she's the manager of a software-testing department. Even when a DBA made the effort to put a legal copy of the product on the machine for us, that wasn't good enough. Kole's leaving the installed copy on her own machine "until they say to take it off". Stupid move.

"And I heard that it's usually the unhappy and disgruntled employees who usually report software piracy, and you KNOW how many of those we have here." - radio ad

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